I set up and decorated best I could. I had asked people to bring boob-themed food, and my contributions to the cause were mozzarella balls with cherry tomato nipples (with tomatoes and crackers), and gummy bears (which is also, you may remember, what they call the material used in silicone implants). I also put out what two friends had mailed me - buckeyes with chocolate nipples added, and homemade oreos, which are round, have two Os, and are cream-filled, just like boobs. (Those were from my friend Dorea, so we called them Doreos - thanks Kate!). I had just bought some nice silver platters at a yard sale ($15 bucks, baby!), so I put everything out on silver and crystal dishes - only the best for my boobie! - including the pink plates and napkins I'd bought. I put a sign on the front of the table that said, "Boob-a-licious!" I wrote a quote from St. Patrick's Breast Plate that seemed apt, and put it up.
I put out some flowers, including some in a boob vase that someone gave me, a friend of a friend I've never met but is an avid reader of this blog and a recent mastectomy/breast cancer survivor (you know who you are! Thanks - it was big hit!).
Then I set up my game: "Pin the Boob on the Survivor." You can buy these games for bachelorette parties and stuff, but it seemed a little more fun and innocent and a lot more hopeful for it to be me. So I made some card stock boobies (each a little different, just like in real life), printed a picture of my face, and drew a line drawing of my body with no boobs, and made a sign, and voila: party game!
When all was clean and set up, I pulled out my party dress - carefully chosen to make me feel very pretty and yes, show off a little of what I got while I got it. Once the dress was on, I thought I'd better do up the rest, so I worked on some make-up, much more than I usually wear - including, of course, some bright red lipstick. Then my hair. Then to top it all off, I broke out the costume jewelry - a rhinestone necklace and earrings to match. I thought about shoes, but then I thought, "It's my party, and I'll go barefoot if I want to." So there.
Then I sat down. All dolled up, clean apartment, but no one had arrived yet. Even though there was music playing, my memory of that moment was that it was so quiet. Just me, sitting there with the recognition of my reality. Ever the extrovert, I felt suddenly very uncomfortable being alone. I felt a little frantic - must have contact! And so I turned to my best processing tool in moments like these: this blog. And I wrote about some moments that were racing through my head during the quiet, and the previous days.
Mercifully, the doorbell range. My first guest! What fun it was for all those people to start coming through the door, each with something delightfully humorous in her hands. Many had never been to my apartment before, so I was glad to share this special place that has been such a haven of peace and calm for me these two years. First person brought wine and even some champagne (which will be drunk when I can drink again, post pain meds, to celebrate being cancer free - again!). The next person brought melon balls with berry nipples. The next, mixings for buttery nipples (butterscotch schnapps and Bailey's Irish Cream - one of my favorite drinks, as it turns out!). The next, two scooped out cantaloupe shells that remarkably resembled a cantaloupe bra, filled with melon balls and blueberries. Then, banana cake baked in boob-shaped cake pans. Finally, chocolate and vanilla boob lollypops. What - a - spread!
I was simply delighted, from the very get-go. All those wonderful people, all those hilarious foods and drinks, all those laughs! What a wonderful time! And everyone was so caring and loving that I didn't even feel like I had to flit around and be stressed about everyone having what they needed. People just did their thing, introduced themselves to each other (no one knew everyone who was there, so there was someone new for everyone!). A good balance of introverts and extroverts kept things lively without me having to do any of the work, but not so lively as to be overwhelming. We oooed and ahhed over the food, we shared some delightful boob and bra stories, we played my games... I also had Michael make a bunch of CDs of a condensed version of my boobie playlist, and I handed them out to people along with Sharpies "in various shades of boob" and had people decorate their own.
(Above - Kristen showing off how much her CD looks like a boob, and me telling a story about how once I wrote that red dress to a New Year's Party and when I raised my arm for whatever reason, I accidentally slipped out, and while I was talking a cute guy no less... and then another, very drunk guy came over and asked if he could kiss me at midnight. I said no.)
I also got a couple gifts, which I opened - some silly things to make me smile, some thoughtful things like tea that supports breast cancer research, one lovely top that is loose and flowy and can be worn over bulky drains. I showed off the special mastectomy garments I had purchased that day. I got a false breast from a friend for whom that particular one didn't work, which I of course promptly wore as a hat.
(I don't know why I think putting things on my head like a hat is a good idea, but you'd be surprised how frequently I do this.)
I worried a little bit when I planned this party that I might have a hard time getting through it, but it was honestly a wonderful time, and felt like a very worthy farewell for a lifelong friend. I felt very surrounded in love and warm, wonderful, woman thoughts (and also some from Michael and Klaus - they were the only boys invited). I'm really glad I did it. I would recommend it to anyone with a sense of humor! Thank you to all who participated.
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